STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize