So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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