you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
