so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
