just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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