This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
