I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
