its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
