you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize