Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
