I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
