I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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