I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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