he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
