Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
