Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I can't turn off my feet"
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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