I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
She even gives head with a lisp.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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