My girlfriend figured out who you are.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
