it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
