GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
