So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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