He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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