You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Randomize