im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
