everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
