We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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