Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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