Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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