I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
