I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Randomize
