is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
either way he was missing a nipple.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
