how can u be prego again
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
