We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
