There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
