I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
