oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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