You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize