We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
