I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Randomize
