Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
