I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
