did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
