she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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