R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
