Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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