addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
