Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize