whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
