i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
