I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
How external is "for external use only"?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
