i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize