don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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